Spider September

A month ago Lyra learned from one of her friends to scream and run every time you see a spider. This then lead to waking up in the middle of the night screaming that there were spiders in the dark. I have a background in field ecology so screaming about spiders is not something I do or have much tolerance for. In an effort to teach her that spiders were not something to be feared I declared September spider month.

I started by ordering a couple of spider books for her little library. I purchased Are You a Spider? and Spiders. These books are illustrated and designed to teach children the biology and life cycle of spiders in a simplistic way. Since I was already ordering books I decided to include

National Audubon Society Field Guide to North American Insects and Spiders for my husband and I so we could properly identify the spiders in our home and yard. 

I also organized some spider coloring art on paper and the windows. There are crafty spider ideas all over the internet.

Spider window art using crayola window crayons

We followed this up with a visit to the Insect Zoo at the Oregon Zoo. Even though spiders are not insects they house a few Mexican red-kneed tarantulas there. This exhibit only briefly held her attention due to the exciting tiger exhibit next door, however she did not show any fear. 

Lyra checking out the Mexican red-kneed tarantulas at the Insect Zoo

Finally, I purchased a movie of one of the most famous spider stories ever written, Charlotte's Web. One of my absolute childhood favorites. She also fell in love with this movie. So much that she informed me yesterday that Charlotte lives on a web in her playhouse and eats lots of flies like a good spider.

This little campaign worked so well that I am considering making October bat month in honor of Halloween. 

I Am a Crunchy Vaccinating Mama

When I took our first daughter in for her two month shots she screamed for four hours afterwards. Her legs swelled from the vaccines and I called my husband crying. How could I have done this to my child? She then fell asleep for six hours and woke up like nothing had ever happened. I really questioned whether or not to put her through that again, but then I thought about what it would be like to have her go through the measles and I decided I would take four hours of discomfort any day!

The state of Oregon has one of the highest percentage of non-vaccinated children in the country. That number has been growing due to fears that vaccine causes autism and the dangers of ingredients such as aluminum and formaldehyde in some vaccines. The argument for vaccines is... well... pollio will kill a child...dead!

I am a crunchy health nut mama. My kids eat all organic and whole grain goodness so I understand the fears of injecting your baby with dangerous ingredients. That being said the toxic ingredients in vaccines are no worse for them then the toxins in a can of tuna fish if you think about it. The amount being injected into your child is nothing compared to what they pick up in their daily environment. As for causing autism well your risk for this disorder is the same with or without the vaccine. The risk of you and your child dying in a car accident on your way to the grocery store is much higher than the risk of an adverse reaction to a vaccine.

In these recent times we have enjoyed longer healthier lives, thanks to modern medicine (this includes vaccines). Somewhere along the line we have forgotten the horrors of the Smallpox epidemic. This horrible disease killed and disfigured millions of people throughout history. We would still be battling Smallpox today if it wasn't for a global effort to eradicate the disease in the 1960s using vaccine. The same can be said for pollio.

I am environmental studies major so I get really irritated when people think they don't have to recycle because everyone else is (Mom and Dad I mean you!). Some folks also think this way about vaccines. I don't have to vaccinate my kids if everyone else is vaccinated. This is true until everyone starts thinking this way and taking protection from those who really need it. My husband was diagnosed two years ago with an autoimmune disorder. The doctor recommend not vaccinating if at all possible since that could make his immune system crazier than it already is. That means it is important for our family to practice herd immunity. If we are all vaccinated then it lowers the risk of him catching something terrible.

As parents we have to make decisions everyday that will affect the health of our children for the rest of their lives. We are also making decision that will affect other children in our community as well. "It takes a village" remember that phrase? Well it really is true in so many ways. Vaccines work and that is not a religious belief it is a fact!
  

To Share or Not to Share?

There are some interesting parenting techniques out there today. The one I have been hearing a lot about is "I don't teach my child to share." This really bothers me and it bothers me even more when I hear peoples reasoning behind it. Its is simply not a black and white issue but a very grey one! There are things to share and things not to share and it is my job as a parent to teach both! Okay maybe I am a bit of a raving hippy socialist to start with, but hear me out.

One of the arguments of forcing a kid to share is that they will learn to take thing that are not theirs. Really?!? I am not saying you have to force your child to share everything but as a parent it is my job to guide them in learning what is their property and what is common ground. Example: Sippy cups and pacifiers are things parents are constantly trying not share even though our toddlers often seem cool with it. However, we know about germs and disease and they do not, so we step intervene in order to teach this. Toys at the toddler gym are common ground and this is where we guide them in the art of sharing. They do not own the red car at the gym and they must learn this even if they do not like it. Consider it their first real world lesson, we all have to do things we don't like.

The other argument I have heard is that kids will not learn how to cope in the real world it they are taught to share. They will think they are entitled to everything. Again, really?!? Maybe I am really teaching my child that they should give back some of the wonderful things they have to those less fortunate. Its a crowded world we live in today and if we do not learn to give and take then the less fortunate are going to be trampled! I want them to enjoy nice things, but also to be kind compassionate people that give back to society. My daughter has wanted toys that belong to other children and I have expressed to her the toy is not hers and then remind her of all the wonderful toys she owns. She may not like it but these are the norms of society I must teach her. I also express to her when another child want one of her toys how nice it is to share and to understand she will get her toy back later or maybe they can play together. She usually catches on and is happy to share. Someday she will grudgingly have to pay taxes but she will enjoy a clean park and good library as a result. She is learning that sharing can be a good thing through examples and parental guidance.

Children work out lots of issues on their own but every now and the parents step into settle major disputes guide them in learning the rules of our society. Just like the courts do for adults who have still not learned the rules. I respect other parents teaching methods so I will never make someone elses child share with mine but I will continue to encourage my daughter to share with others when appropriate because I feel that is my parental duty.

Kids, Chickens and Eggs!

Today most kids are very displaced from where their food comes from. It is very important to my husband and I that our kids understand their food from its beginning to end. Our quarter acer lot has provided enough space for us to do that. Two springs ago we started building garden beds and planting fruit trees which are really starting to produce fruits and vegetables this year and have been a blast for our toddler. I have wanted to raise chickens for sometime now and eggs have become a favorite with our two girls . If you have checked the price of organic eggs at your local grocery store lately its not cheap!

This winter we decided to finally get our chickens. In February I went down to Livingscape, our local feed store to check out what they had in the way of chicks. We had decided to get two chicks to start with since Portland has a limit of three hens chickens without a permit within city limits. When I got to the feed store there were only three chicks left. I couldn't just leave one there so of course I took all three. The man working that day was not a regular and was not exactly sure what breed they were. Lyra was so excited about the chicks she could hardly stand it. When we got home we set up a large cardboard box with a heat lamp in Etta's room since she was still co-sleeping with us. Lyra would drag every guest we had upstairs to meet the chicks. She proudly named the yellow chick Cinderella Chicken and the two black ones Tinkerbell and Fluffy.

Next we had to select a chicken co-op. With a four month old and two year old I was not really up for building one and my husband's handy skills are somewhat limited, so I purchased one from Chicken Gardener out of Eugene. We selected their small "Chicken Tractor" model with wheels that could be moved around the yard so they always had fresh grass and we could park the coop on our raised garden beds in the winter. They delivered the coop to our yard fully built for no extra charge.

From left to right: Tinkerbell, Fluffy and Cinderella Chicken

The chickens moved into their new coop in mid March. By May they were starting to look like identifiable adult breeds and we started to research what breeds we might have. We have identified Cinderella Chicken as a New Hampshire Red and Tinkerbell and Fluffy as Plymouth Rocks. Both known to be solid egg layers and good cold weather birds which is always a bonus for those cold snaps. As of yesterday Cinderella Chicken laid her first two eggs. The second one significantly smaller than the first which is fairly typical when they first start to lay eggs. It will be a few of weeks before she starts laying with consistency in size and numbers. The New Hampshire Reds are know to be early layers so it will be a few weeks before we see any eggs from Tinkerbell and Fluffy.

Daddy, Lyra and Aggie checking out the first egg!

"Is it worth it?" that is the big question that everyone asks. The cost of the coop, lamp and feeders are your big startup costs, which runs around $450 for 3-4 chickens, after that it is fairly inexpensive. We spend about $15 a month on organic feed and they consume a lot of our fruit and vegetable compostables. They will soon be laying around 60 eggs a month when they are all laying and that is about $0.25 an egg. If you buy organic eggs you are saving a little bit. Maintenance is fairly minimal as well. I spend a total of 5 minutes in the morning checking food, water and bedding and again at night. If I have to leave for the weekend they are usually fine on their own for couple of days with some extra food and a full tank of water. The excitement and knowledge Lyra has gained from the experience is worth every penny!   

First Time Running Mama I Salute You!

I am not a great motivational speaker, but I have some words for mamas that are getting out there and running for the first time after giving birth or for the first time ever. First of all, you are amazing! I will admit I have been a runner most my life, but now that I have two children I have been pregnant or nursing for 3 years and counting. When you are pregnant and/or nursing your body is not really yours anymore. For the half hour or so I am out running, walking or crawling (that's right crawling! Don't tell me your toddler always sleeps through the night) my body is mine for that time, just me and my thoughts. I see lots of first timers trying to do that same.

Hey mamas! It is okay to walk! The thing I notice most about new runners is a complete fear of what other people will think of them and their ability. I am here to tell you that this fear is irrational! What I love about distance running is most anyone can do it and no one is saying "oh look at how slow or fat she is." As the moms I run with will tell you "we all walked up the hill when we started." I have the same respect if not more for a mama walking her first 5k than a seasoned runner working on their 15th half marathon.

"My feet hurt when I run so I guess I am not a runner" is a phrase I hear far too often. If you are doing something you have never done before it is suppose to hurt a bit! Anything worth doing has a bit of pain. If you are a mama then you gave birth whether it was naturally or c-section and I think we would all agree that it was totally worth it and we would do it all over again. You are a sleep deprived warrior now and a 5k is nothing! To all mamas thinking about getting out there its time to grab that stroller and give it a shot. Whether you are doing it to lose weight, stay fit or keep you mental sanity you have more supporters out there than you know!

Me and Etta at the 2014 Rhody Run 12k in Port Townsend, WA

Toddler Crossfit

I recently got back into a running routine after having our second daughter. It isn't easy to find the time. Leave the house at 5:30AM before everyone is awake to get in a 3-4 mile run three times a week. My brother came over for dinner one night and I was telling him that I was getting back into running. "You need to join a gym and do crossfit" he tells me. Clearly my brother does not have young children at home. "Crossfit? I have a two year old! I am already doing crossfit!" I answered. You might think I am joking but I am here to tell that chasing a toddler all day is definitely a form of crossfit.

Crossfit routines incorporate high-intensity interval training, weightlifting, plyometrics, calisthenics, and other exercises. These are just a few elements of crossfit that are accomplished daily by parents everywhere.

• High-intensity interval training is alternating periods of short intense anaerobic exercise with less-intense recovery periods. You can do this exercise by chasing a toddler running down the hallway with half a roll of toilet paper streaming behind them. When they see mama coming behind them they will start running faster as they hang a left into the living room. You then book it at high speed to prevent that toilet paper from being wrapped around the coffee table. When you finally get the toilet paper from your toddler you will begin picking up all the ripped pieces up and catching your breath. Before you finish you will look up to see the toddler throwing handfuls of dirt out of your favorite houseplant and you are up and running again.

• Weightlifting is where an athlete attempts a maximum-weight single lift of a barbell loaded with weight plates. This exercise is best executed with multiple children in a parking lot setting. Strap infant baby to chest and when your toddler refuses to hold your hand and wants to run into oncoming traffic you will quickly snatch them up and lift them over a shoulder in a clean and jerk motion to avoid hitting the infant.

• Plyometrics involves having muscles exert maximum force in as short a time as possible, with the goal of increasing both speed and power. This can be dubbed the super mom exercise. Toddler climbs on top of a bar stool to grab a bunch of grapes off the counter as their foot slips and your toddler starts to struggle for balance you spring into super mode lunging forward to grab your toddler's arm at the last second. This can be expected to occur 3-4 times daily leaving you with well toned calf muscles.

• Calisthenics are a form of exercise consisting of a variety of exercises, often rhythmical movements. They are intended to increase body strength and flexibility with movements such as bending, jumping, swinging, twisting or kicking. What better place for calisthenics then the playground? Toddlers generally obsess on one or two pieces of playground equipment, usually the slide or the swings. Which will require you to help your toddler up to the top of the slide climbing those steps over and over and over... The swings only requires you to push but your toddler will want up and down out of the swings many time causing you to twist and bend many times. The real workout happens when you tell them its time to go home. This will trigger screams and running. This will give you more weightlifting and plyometrics to get them into the car.

Lyra on the swing

The next time someone suggests an exercise routine you just gotta try you can suggest the toddler crossfit. Tell them you will even lend them a toddler for the day. Guaranteed to give you a workout you never knew existed. It even comes with a brain workout as the toddler will ask half a millions questions you never thought were worth asking throughout the day. For those in need of a more strenuous workout throw in an infant and/or puppy. I hear twin toddlers will double the workout as well. 

Help a Mama Out

My second daughter is now seven months old and I finally am feeling like my old self again. It has taken me a few months to write this blog because it is a difficult thing to write about. Hell asking for help is a difficult thing for me to do in general. I mean we all want to be super mom, right? When I had our first daughter everyone was coming by and asking how they could help out and were always visiting. It was stressful to try and look presentable all the time but it really did help me feel not cut off from the world. With the second one everyone assumed I knew the ropes so there was no need to check in. This assumption could not have been further from the truth. All our parents took off right after she was born and that was that. Here is where I admit I have never needed more help in my life and got so little.

Second children are twice as hard when they arrive because suddenly there are two children to care for. Not only are you completely energy drained and taking care of a newborn and in my case there was also an energy bound needy toddler. My husband took the first two months off of work to help out which was great. It really did help and I really was doing great. When he went back to work things were still pretty good for awhile and then at about four months it became obvious I had developed postpartum thyroidtis.

I felt like I was on a roller coaster with whiplash. I started gaining back some of the weight I had lost. I was tired and cold all the time. I had trouble functioning with simple tasks and memory. To make matters worse my hair was coming out by the handfuls. My milk supply dropped so the baby was eating twice as often and getting frustrated. My husband would come home and I would be rocking two crying children while I too was crying too from complete exhaustion. At one point I got sick and I knew I needed help and my family lives up on the Olympic Peninsula so that was out. I begged my husband to take one day off to help me until the fever and body aches went away. After taking two months off already he could not afford to take off anymore. He was reluctant to ask his folks in fear of them thinking we couldn't handle our own children. My mother suggested I hire someone to help with the cleaning. Great in theory until you factor in the the size of the hospital bills we were paying off. I finally got my husband to ask his mother to help and she could only help one day a week once in awhile during the toddler's nap time or sometimes after my husband got home from work. Not ideal but it was better than nothing.

Finally at about six months my energy came back my hair started growing back! I felt like I was back in the world of the living. It was probably two of the longest darkest months of my life. The first six months with any newborn whether it is your first or fifth is always the hardest. My advice to friends and family who are close to those with newborns is to check in frequently during those first six months. Take the toddler out and let mom get a nap! Things may appear fine and dandy on the outside but chances are there is a lot going on just below the surface. A female body just made a whole new human! It takes some time to truly recover from something like that. I write about this because even though I felt completely alone at the time, I know that I was not alone. There are mothers out there having similar experiences.  

Lyra (24m) and Etta (3m)